So obviously we’ve all heard of the phrase “the birds and the bees”, but we will dive deep into why that is so important in a marriage relationship. Lets face it, marriage can be hard sometimes, but what a couple do to stay united in their marriage? God has given us romantic feelings for the soul purpose of bringing children into the world and feeling relieved and comfort from our spouse. This special relationship that you have or will create with your spouse is sacred and should only be done between a husband and wife. The feelings that you feel during these sexual relations are great for keeping you in need of your spouse. God made us sexually incompatible which gives us the need to gain a good friendship with our spouse, sex will not keep a relationship together alone. The world teaches that sex is there to relieve stress and gain affection and pleasure. God’s idea of it is to multiply and replenish the world. Sex is presented in many movies following drugs and alcohol abuse. Its like the world treats sex as an entertainment thing with no feelings or emotions attached. Isn’t it interesting how much society can change the intentions of the Lord?
Now what if a person has multiple sex partners? What happens to those feelings that, that person feels toward each partner? In women especially, there is a dopamine that gives her a sense of attachment to that person she sexual relations with. This could have a big effect if she happens to have multiple partners, all those feelings are spread out and she wouldn’t feel as attached as a married committed couple would be. This could be the reason why cohabitation before marriage is a problem, it’s because of the lack of commitment to that particular person. You both may live together, but since there is no binding commitment as marriage there is a chance that the two people will have extra partners if their roommate isn’t satisfying their sexual needs.
Another problem that effects sexual intimacy in a marriage is pornography. Pornography can affect the man as well as the woman in a relationship. Pornography is all about unrealistic expectations that can affect the way a person thinks especially about their spouse. Their spouse is then competing for their feelings and pleasure and can tear a marriage apart in no time. Pornography can take many forms, such as being presented in movies, magazines, books, music and so on. Society has accepted it and it can be very hard to overcome it. When people view porn and are especially addicted to it, they are desensitized the sexual feelings overtime and they will need more get aroused in the same way they did before. It is important to note that if you are addicted to porn, don’t think that marriage will solve that addiction. If anything, it is a divorce waiting to happen because of the unrealistic expectations mentioned above. A quote from Theodore Roosevelt states “comparison is the thief of joy”. Those who view pornography are not happy and when it comes to the real relationship, you will be disappointed.
There is hope for those who are addicted though. It is the atonement of Jesus Christ. Jesus is the ultimate healer, and He has performed many miracles and is still performing miracles now. If you are having these struggles and you have a sincere desire to change, then you will be healed through His power authority.
After marriage, there are multiple issues that can result in a lack of trust in your partner that would be great to be aware of and talk with your spouse about. The main one is affairs, which can come up through social media, spending alone time with someone of the opposite gender or multiple lunch dates with coworkers of the opposite sex. Girls nights out and guys nights out are just more temptation to infidelity and problems in your relationships. Always remember to put your spouse first and never put friends, careers, or any other object before your spouse. Always love her and keep the vows you’ve made with them on your wedding day.
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