The topic for today is the thing that sparks the foundation of the family unit. It is marriage. How does marriage start? Referring to my dating post, a couple must get to know each other, become close friends, and commit to loving each other. That’s mainly what marriage is all about, is your commitment to the other person. When two people marry, there is a sense of trust and expectation from each of the partners. It’s not easy being married but when you and your spouse work together to make ends meet, you will find that marriage is a very fulfilling relationship that can last forever. This can be done through fulfilling duties, loving, and respecting your spouse and communicating problems. The next big factor is bringing children into the mix. Pretty soon you’ll have kids, and the majority of your time will be devoted to taking care of them, which means little time for you and your spouse. This depression stage is known as the baby blues. This is a big problem because the lack of motivation and desire to keep moving forward can lead to grumpiness, anger and sometimes even divorce.
Now there is good news for those who struggle with this. It is establishing good moral standards and boundaries, and these are best done by keeping God in the center of our homes. Boundaries for setting time apart to be with your spouse to keep your relationship strong and to show them that you still care about them. The standards to show that you won’t cheat and so you can trust your spouse that they will make appropriate decisions, and if there were to be a problem you would talk about it.
Communication is also very important when it comes to marriage, because usually your spouse is not a mind reader and can’t always tell if there’s a problem or not. I served a church mission and I had to stay with a companion 24/7-that we couldn’t pick-which was not easy, especially if you don’t have a lot in common. But during that time, we set aside an hour or so every week to talk about how the companionship was going, what was going well, and how we could improve. It’s also important to note that we would always say how WE can be better and not call the person out individually. Through my experience, I have seen that as so as a person is being attacked or feels attacked, they, they would be more likely to close up and harden their hearts to change. That can and will lead to major problems. But when you bring up a common problem that has been occurring in your marriage relationship as a “how can WE fix this” instead of “you need to change because”, it will allow you and your spouse to be open to compromises. This will also allow understanding and will be a result of less blow ups and fights.
The last thing I would like to mention is to be smart when you are planning the wedding. Make it so both partners are planning the wedding and don’t go too far into debt for one day. Sometimes the husband gets left out of these things and that can promote individuality and not unity in your companionship. Women, let the men help, invite them to do things so they can feel included and helpful. Men are task oriented and sometimes they don’t know how to help the women because they are always at work or they don’t feel as attached to particularly the children. Most men including myself are usually not as good at taking care of children then the mother which isn’t necessarily a bad thing. That’s the beauty of the different roles the father and mother play in marriage.
I hope this information was helpful to you. Have a blessed day and don’t forget to subscribe and comment.
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